Stanley Siegel, LCSW, is a psychotherapist, author, international lecturer, and former Director of Education at New York’s renowned Ackerman Institute for Family Therapy. With over 36 years of experience, Siegel has developed an unconventional and highly regarded approach to psychotherapy. Stanley's latest book, "Your Brain on Sex: How Smarter Sex Can Change Your Life" is out now!
Beyond Sexual Orientation

Beyond Sexual Orientation

Gay, straight, it just doesn’t matter anymore. Heterosexuality is not what it’s cut out to be. The labels that exist to describe us typically fall short of encompassing the fullness of human sexuality. Some years ago a patient came to me to deal with his sexual identity issues. When I...
The Soul of Therapy

The Soul of Therapy

Our Problems Are Our Solutions. As I continue to teach and lecture among my colleagues around the world, I have become increasingly aware that most psychotherapists train and practice within a paradigm that sees patients’ problems as rooted in pathology. These therapists wait and watch for a symptom to see how  it  might fit...
Intelligent Lust: It's More than Just Great Sex,

Intelligent Lust: It’s More than Just Great Sex,

It’s Smart Sex. Step Six: Acting Out Sexual Fantasies If you’ve followed the steps of Intelligent Lust this far, by now you’ve gained an understanding of your true sexual desires and their meaning and purpose in your life. You may have even met someone with whom you share the likelihood...
Cracking The Code of Sexual Chemistry

Cracking The Code of Sexual Chemistry

Using sexual chemistry to guide you to the right partner Step 4 of Intelligent Lust: Cracking the Code of Sexual Chemistry We’ve all had the experience of seeing someone on the street or in a social setting and feeling an instant attraction. Our eyes lock, our pulse races, everyone else...
What Do Our Fantasies Say About the Past?

What Do Our Fantasies Say About the Past?

Where do our fantasies and erotic images come from and what do they tell us about the deeper nature of who we are? We have been led to believe that our sexual fantasies are random imaginings, but nothing could be further from the truth. At their base lies fragments of...
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The Modern Family

The Modern Family

New Family and Sex-Positive Values Today’s American family isn’t what it used to be. The days of “Leave It to Beaver” have been replaced with “Modern Family,” a more accurate representation of home life. The nuclear family, the blended family, and the family with same sex-parents are equally visible, loving, funny and messy. The notion...
My Father, the Ethical Slut

My Father, the Ethical Slut

A daughter responds to her father’s unconventional sex life My daughter, Alyssa, wrote this week’s column. I am mourning the unexpected death of a close friend, who was a member of my family of choice. In her column, my daughter responds to my recent argument in favor of casual sex which has gotten a lot...
The Case Against Marriage

The Case Against Marriage

Marriage does more harm than good. With New York joining a list of states legalizing it, Republican candidates calling for the Constitution to ban it and a Supreme Court decision likely needed to resolve the confusion, it’s no wonder same-sex marriage is a hot topic. Why are we fighting for marriage when it doesn’t work...
Why I Advocate For Casual Sex

Why I Advocate For Casual Sex

Taking on the critics After getting dozens of comments, it is clear my last column, In Defense of Casual Sex, has struck a very deep chord. With seventy thousand readers and counting, sides have been drawn, some stones have been cast and heartfelt thoughts have certainly been shared about casual sex. I am more than glad. This enormous...
In Defense of Casual Sex

In Defense of Casual Sex

Sex without commitment can improve your life. In the new film “Shame,” an examination of the extremes of human sexuality,  Brandon Sullivan, a successful, handsome New York executive afraid of intimacy, has frequent, random sex with prostitutes and strangers. At work, he sneaks off to masturbate in the men’s room or extends his lunch hour with  trysts. The movie  harshly depicts casual...
The Soul of Therapy

The Soul of Therapy

Our Problems Are Our Solutions. As I continue to teach and lecture among my colleagues around the world, I have become increasingly aware that most psychotherapists train and practice within a paradigm that sees patients’ problems as rooted in pathology. These therapists wait and watch for a symptom to see how  it  might fit into a a category of...
A Dangerous Method: Can Sex Restore Mental Health?

A Dangerous Method: Can Sex Restore Mental Health?

Sexual Desire in Therapy The newly released film “A Dangerous Method” tells the story of the complex relationship between Sigmund Freud and his much younger heir-apparent, Carl Jung, both early founders of the modern field of psychology. Freud and Jung came to represent differing schools of psychoanalytic thinking, a separation not only hastened by intellectual...
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